The Magical Potty Trading Chart: Pt 1
By Sage Ann
Mike Karlight sits on the edge of his bed, the plastic-backed underwear crinkling beneath him as he shifts his weight. He's eight years old – far too old, he thinks, to still be wearing what amounts to a diaper to bed. The morning light slants through his bedroom window, illuminating the damp sheets he'll have to strip before school. Another night, another failure. If only Samantha weren't getting so close to staying dry for a full week. The thought of his seven-year-old sister graduating to regular underwear at night before him makes his stomach twist into knots.
"Mike! Breakfast!" His mother's voice drifts up the stairs.
He sighs and peels off the soggy garment, shoving it deep into his hamper where no one will notice. The promise hovers in his mind like a distant star – stay dry for a week, and the nighttime diapers can go away forever. So simple, yet so impossible.
Downstairs, the kitchen thrums with the chaotic energy of the Karlight household. His eighteen-year-old sister Heather leans against the counter, scrolling through her phone with one hand while absently stirring her coffee with the other. She's practically an adult, impossibly mature in Mike's eyes – someone who hasn't had to think about bathroom accidents in over a decade.
Samantha sits at the table, her legs swinging beneath her chair, not quite reaching the floor. Her dark hair is pulled into messy pigtails, and she smiles at Mike with a knowing look that makes him want to disappear.
"Did you stay dry last night?" she whispers when he sits next to her.
Mike shakes his head, his cheeks burning. "Did you?"
"Yep." Her smile grows wider, smugger. "That's three nights in a row now."
The knot in Mike's stomach tightens. Three nights. She only needs four more. He's never made it past two.
At the other end of the table, Mary, their five-year-old sister, chews on a piece of toast while absently sucking her thumb between bites. She's still in pull-ups during the day, though she insists she's ready for "big girl underwear." A dark stain on her pajama bottoms suggests otherwise.
Their mother appears with three-year-old Julie balanced on her hip. The youngest Karlight is still fully in the diaper phase, her pajamas printed with cartoonish puppies, a pacifier bobbing in her mouth as she sleepily surveys the breakfast scene.
"Mike, did you change your sheets?" His mother asks, setting Julie in her booster seat.
He stares at his cereal. "I'll do it after breakfast."
She sighs, a sound he's come to recognize as disappointed but understanding. "Okay, but don't forget. I'll put fresh ones on your bed tonight."
"I won't need them," Mike says with more confidence than he feels. "I'm going to stay dry tonight."
Samantha snorts. "That's what you said yesterday."
"And the day before," Heather adds without looking up from her phone. She isn't trying to be mean – it's just a fact, delivered with the casual indifference of a sibling who's outgrown such concerns.
"Heather, don't tease," their mother says, though there's no real reprimand in her tone. She turns to Julie, who's starting to fuss. "Looks like someone needs a change before I drop her at daycare."
Mike watches as his mother lifts Julie from her seat, the little girl's diaper visibly sagging. Julie doesn't care – she has no concept of the embarrassment Mike feels every morning. She'll grow out of diapers eventually, everyone does. Everyone except him, it seems.
"I bet I'll be out of nighttime diapers before you," Samantha whispers, a competitive glint in her eye.
"Will not," Mike hisses back.
"Will too. Mom said three more dry nights and I'm done with them forever."
Mike pushes away from the table, his appetite gone. It isn't fair. They're practically the same age – he's only a year older – yet somehow Samantha is winning this unspoken race.
School that day drags like a wet cloth across rough pavement. Mike sits at his desk, half-listening to his teacher explain fractions, his mind occupied with strategies to stay dry. Maybe if he doesn't drink anything after dinner? Or if he wakes himself up in the middle of the night? He's tried both before, with no success.
At recess, he sits alone on a bench near the fence, watching other kids play. None of them, he's certain, still wet the bed. None of them still wear diapers at night.
"You look like someone stole your dessert."
Mike startles at the voice. A boy he's never seen before stands in front of him, head tilted to one side. He has hair the color of autumn leaves and eyes that seem to shift between green and gold when he moves. There's something strange about him – not strange in a bad way, but strange like finding a four-leaf clover or seeing a double rainbow.
"I'm Robin," the boy says, sitting next to Mike without invitation. His movements are fluid, almost dancing, even when he's just sitting down. "You're Mike."
It isn't a question. Mike frowns. "How do you know my name?"
Robin shrugs, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. "I know lots of things. Like how you're worried about something."
"I'm not worried," Mike says too quickly.
"Sure you are. Your eyebrows scrunch up like this" Robin demonstrates, pulling his own eyebrows together in an exaggerated frown, "when you're thinking about it."
Mike shifts on the bench, uncomfortable with how easily this strange boy seems to read him. "Are you new? I haven't seen you before."
"New enough," Robin says, which isn't really an answer. He leans in conspiratorially. "So what's the worry? Failed a test? Sister being annoying? Monster under the bed?"
"No monster," Mike mumbles, then immediately regrets his choice of words.
Robin's eyes light up. "Ah, but there is a bed problem, isn't there?"
Mike freezes. How could he possibly know? He glances around to make sure no one else is listening. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Sure you do." Robin reaches into his pocket and pulls out what looks like a folded piece of paper. "It's about the nighttime diapers, right?"
The words hit Mike like a punch to the stomach. He feels his face flame red, panic rising in his chest. "How"
"I told you, I know things." Robin unfolds the paper, revealing a colorful chart. "And I know how to help."
Mike should be mortified, should be running away from this weird kid who somehow knows his deepest secret. Instead, he finds himself leaning forward, curiosity overriding his embarrassment.
"What is that?"
"A potty training chart." Robin says it like he's offering treasure. "Not just any chart, though. A special one."
The chart is divided into seven columns, one for each day of the week. Each day is split down the middle – one side labeled "DAY" with a bright sun, the other "NIGHT" with a crescent moon. At the top is a space for names.
"It comes with these," Robin continues, producing a small cloth bag from his other pocket. He tips its contents into his palm – tiny magnets, each no bigger than a quarter, shaped like various symbols.
"This one," Robin holds up a magnet of a green moon holding its nose, "is for when you poop at night. This yellow dripping moon is for wetting. And this" he shows a smiling sun with a thumbs up, "is for staying dry and clean."
He displays the rest: a green cloud holding its nose for daytime accidents, a sad raincloud for daytime wetting, and a cheerful rainbow with sun for staying dry during the day.
"How is a chart supposed to help?" Mike asks, though he can't deny he's intrigued.
Robin's smile widens, showing teeth that seem just a bit too sharp. "Magic," he whispers.
Mike rolls his eyes. "There's no such thing as magic."
"Isn't there?" Robin raises an eyebrow. "Maybe you just haven't seen it yet."
Before Mike can argue, Robin presses the chart and magnets into his hands. "Try it. What have you got to lose?"
The paper feels strangely warm against Mike's skin, almost humming with energy. He tells himself it's just his imagination.
"There's one very important rule," Robin says, his voice suddenly serious. "Everyone in your household who might have an accident needs to have their name on the chart. Everyone. Otherwise, it won't work properly."
"That's stupid," Mike says, but he tucks the chart into his backpack anyway. "But thanks, I guess."
Robin stands, stretching like a cat in the sun. "Don't thank me yet," he says, and there's a glint in his eye that makes Mike wonder if he's missed something important. "You might not like the results."
Before Mike can ask what he means, the recess bell rings. When he looks back, Robin is gone, as if he'd never been there at all.
Mike spends the rest of the school day thinking about the chart. It's ridiculous, of course. A piece of paper can't keep him dry at night. But as he walks home with Samantha, the chart seems to grow heavier in his backpack, calling to him.
"What's that?" Samantha asks when he finally pulls it out in their shared bedroom after dinner.
Mike hesitates, then decides there's no harm in showing her. "A potty training chart. A kid at school gave it to me."
Samantha examines it, her initial skepticism giving way to interest when she sees the colorful magnets. "Cool! Can I be on it too?"
"I guess," Mike says, surprised by her enthusiasm. "I think we're supposed to put everyone on it who... you know."
Samantha nods solemnly. They both know who in the house still has accidents.
"Do you really think it'll work?" she asks.
Mike thinks of Robin's strange, shifting eyes and the way he seemed to appear and disappear like a trick of the light. He remembers the boy's parting words: You might not like the results.
"I don't know," he admits. "But it can't hurt to try, right?"
As he writes out the names on small white magnets – his own, Samantha's, Mary's, Julie's – Mike feels a flutter of something between hope and trepidation. The chart seems to almost glow in the evening light, the magnets clinking together with a sound like distant laughter.
Whatever happens, Mike thinks, at least he's trying something new. And maybe, just maybe, it will help him win the race against Samantha to ditch the nighttime diapers once and for all.
That evening, Mike hangs the potty training chart on the living room wall with careful reverence. He stands back, admiring how official it looks with its neat columns and bright colors. The white magnets with their carefully printed names – MIKE, SAMANTHA, MARY, JULIE – line up along the left side, waiting for tomorrow's first entries. The small bag of moon and sun magnets sits on the side table below, ready to mark their successes and failures for all to see. It feels important somehow, like setting up an altar to the gods of dry nights and clean sheets.
"What's this?" His mother appears behind him, drying her hands on a dish towel. She peers at the chart, her head tilted in curiosity.
Mike shifts his weight from one foot to the other. "It's a potty training chart. A kid at school gave it to me."
"A potty training chart," she repeats, examining the colorful magnets. "That's actually a good idea. Where did you get all these cute little magnets?"
"Robin gave them to me," Mike says, then realizes he doesn't know Robin's last name or even which class he's in. "He's... new, I think."
His mother nods absently, more interested in the chart than the mysterious benefactor. "I like how you've included everyone. Even Julie, though I think she's a ways off from full training."
Mike explains his plan, his words tumbling out faster as his enthusiasm grows. "See, if we track it every day, we can see how close everyone is. And maybe it'll help me and Samantha stay dry at night. Robin said everyone has to have their name on it for it to work right."
"Did he now?" His mother's lips quirk into a small smile. "Well, it certainly can't hurt. And it might help you visualize your progress."
From the doorway, Samantha snorts. "It'll help me see how I'm beating Mike, you mean."
"You are not beating me," Mike says, his earlier excitement souring.
"Am too. Three nights dry already." Samantha saunters into the room, her confidence radiating from her small frame. "By this time next week, I'll be diaper-free and you'll still be waking up wet."
"Will not!"
"Will too!"
Their mother sighs the sigh of a woman who's heard this exchange in various forms a thousand times. "No one is beating anyone. This isn't a race."
But it is, and all three of them know it. In the economy of childhood dignity, being the older sibling still stuck in nighttime diapers when your younger sister has graduated to regular underwear is a bankruptcy from which there is no recovery.
"I'm going to win," Samantha says, flicking one of the magnets. "And then you'll have to call me 'Dry Queen Samantha' while you're still in your baby diapers."
Mike's face burns. "Mom! Tell her to stop!"
"Samantha, enough teasing," their mother says, but the warning lacks force. "This chart is supposed to help, not create more fighting."
"I'm just stating facts," Samantha says with a shrug that's far too adult for her seven years. "I'm winning, and Mike knows it."
Mike opens his mouth for a heated retort when the front door swings open with a bang, followed by a trail of water droplets on the hardwood floor. Heather stands in the entryway, her jeans and t-shirt soaked through, hair plastered to her forehead.
"What happened to you?" their mother asks, already moving to grab a towel from the laundry room.
Heather pushes wet hair from her face, leaving streaks of what might be car soap on her cheek. "The stupid hose went crazy when I turned it on. It backfired or something and got me right in the face, then the nozzle broke off and sprayed everywhere before I could shut it off."
She accepts the towel her mother offers, dabbing at her face before gesturing helplessly at her soaked clothing. "I was just trying to wash my car."
Mike and Samantha exchange a look before breaking into giggles. Heather, usually so composed and mature, looks ridiculous with her soggy clothes clinging to her lanky teenage frame.
"It's not funny," Heather says, but a smile tugs at the corner of her mouth. "I'm literally standing in a puddle of my own making."
Their mother glances from Heather's wet pants to the potty chart and back again, a mischievous gleam in her eye. "Mike, I think you need to add Heather to your chart."
The room goes silent. Mike blinks, uncertain if he's heard correctly.
"What?" Heather and Mike say in unison.
"Well, look at her," their mother gestures at Heather's dripping form. "She's currently in wet pants, isn't she? By the rules of the chart, she should be tracked too."
Mike's initial confusion gives way to horror as understanding arrives. "She doesn't count! She doesn't wear diapers!"
"That's not fair," Mike says, half-indignant. "The chart is for people who have accidents, not people who get splashed with a hose."
Heather folds her arms across her chest, the towel now as wet as her clothes. "Yeah, I'm eighteen, not eight. I don't need to be on a potty training chart."
Their mother's smile widens. "Now, now, let's be consistent. If we're tracking everyone in the house who might have an accident, we should include everyone."
"But she doesn't have accidents," Mike protests. "She got wet from a hose. That's different."
"Is it?" their mother asks, her tone light but her eyes dancing with amusement. "Water is water, wet is wet. And the rules of your chart say everyone gets tracked."
Samantha, catching on to her mothers joke, nods solemnly. "It's only fair, Mike. If I have to be on the chart, Heather does too."
Heather rolls her eyes, water still dripping from her clothes onto the floor. "This is ridiculous. I don't need potty training. I've been using the toilet successfully for fifteen years or so."
"True," their mother says, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "But the chart isn't just for who needs training, it's for tracking accidents. And while it's true that you don't wear diapers now, if you were to start wetting your pants regularly, well..." She lets the sentence hang, her implication clear.
"Mom!" Heather's voice rises an octave. "You wouldn't!"
"Well, what's good for the gosling is good for the goose," their mother says with a wink. "If the little ones have to wear protection when they wet, so would you."
Mike can't help but laugh at the mental image of his towering teenage sister in a diaper like Julie's. The absurdity of it breaks through his earlier irritation.
Heather's mouth opens and closes several times before she breaks into laughter too. "Fine, put me on the stupid chart. But I'm not wearing diapers, no matter what the hose does to me."
The tension in the room dissolves as quickly as it formed. Mike, still grumbling, adds Heather's name to the last white magnet and places it on the chart. It feels silly, but also right somehow – Robin did say everyone in the household needed to be on it.
"There," he says, stepping back. "Now everyone's accounted for."
"Great," Heather says, squelching toward the stairs. "I'm going to change into dry pants before Mom decides I need plastic backing on my underwear."
Their mother chuckles. "Good idea. And hang those wet things in the bathtub, please."
As Heather disappears upstairs, Mike studies the chart with renewed interest. Five names now, five people to track. It seems more complete this way, more balanced.
"You know this is still just a game, right?" his mother says, ruffling his hair. "No one's going to think less of you if Samantha gets out of nighttime diapers first."
But Mike knows that's not true. He will think less of himself. And now, with the chart hanging prominently in the living room, everyone will see his failures displayed in yellow dripping moons and his successes (should they ever come) in smiling suns.
"I know," he lies. "It's just for fun."
Samantha smirks at him from across the room, clearly unconvinced. The unspoken competition between them remains, chart or no chart.
Later that night, as Mike lies in bed with the plastic-backed underwear crinkling beneath him, he thinks about Robin and the strange, warm feeling of the chart in his hands. He thinks about Heather's name, added almost as an afterthought, a joke.
Everyone in your household who might have an accident needs to have their name on the chart, Robin had said. Everyone.
Mike isn't sure why, but as he drifts toward sleep, he can't shake the feeling that something important has been set in motion – something beyond a simple contest between siblings.
In the quiet darkness of his room, he could almost swear he hears distant, impish laughter.