Hentai Academy: making it happen...
Happy new year, guys. Or hopeful new year, better said?
Some of you may have noticed I'm not updating Trello anymore and my activity on Discord has been very sparse.
Part of the reason was Christmas. It is a special time and family duty calls (even this past year).
The other part of the reason is that I'm not focusing my efforts on technical tasks like animation or feature implementation. Things I could show you and talk about at length.
Nope. Now I am writing.
The thing is, every game needs a plot and dialogues. And I've grown more and more uneasy and stressed about the fact that all this time I've had a general idea of how Hentai Academy will work out... but I didn't have a single line of dialogue written to that effect.
And, honestly speaking, I was turning hysterical about that lack of essence. I could have the best 2D models in the world, but they would be soulless constructs of a world existing only in my mind. The very underwhelming reaction to the model viewer demo was the ultimate proof of that.
So, I've decided to "make it happen". I've flipped some switches in my brain and now I am in creative-monk mode. Which, in my case, means that now I am an amateur writer.
I'm creating the text content for 0.1, with my sights put on the long term. Fixed characters are being designed and given a personality and motivations, a double-route for each is being imagined and shaped into a gradual progression, events are being pseudo-scripted and their dialogues are being written with special care to avoid redundancy and incoherence...
Not gonna lie... this should be made by just one person working full-time. But I don't have that luxury, and even if I had the resources I just know I wouldn't be fully happy with the results. In that sense, I highly empathize with AKABUR, the godfather of crowdfunded h-games who through the years has made true gems... only "slowly" as fuck from the PoV of many.
However... guys, I know I'm not going to blow out your mind with this statement but... taking a fantasy and make it "happen"? It's not easy.
I usually read suggestions like "You could do this, and then this could happen, and maybe then this other thing could happen...", and if I had a dollar thrown at me each time I've read the word "could", to encompass the fantasies, hopes, and even expectations of the people aware of this project... I wouldn't have financial issues by now.
But one thing is our brains fantasizing about complex worlds, which works at fucking light speed... and a very different matter is that brain sending signals to your hands to make it happen, even at a meager 10% of its imagined glory. Cyberpunk 2077 anyone...?
So, I've decided to retreat to the relative safety of my brain, and make the difficult act of believing in my imperfect self. I know 0.1 won't be liked by everybody and that is fine. But I can't lock myself into a never-ending cycle of doubting my design decisions and lose time in making the most vocal people aware of this project happy.
In short: I'm writing now something that will be loved by many, and be a disappointment for many. And that is fine.
It is fine because it will be REAL.
Thanks for reading and start the year with strength! ;-)