The Daycare Helper - Be Careful About The Jobs You Aply For...

My name is Sid. I'm 22 years old and I'm in Business Administration, but I'm having trouble finishing the first semester. Financial problems. My mother didn't have much money, but I still decided to travel to another state and start college. Until then I lived alone on the college campus, but I was running out of money. I definitely needed a job, which was very difficult to get. I had no experience in anything, I had never worked, I had never done extra curricular work. All I've done in my life is be lazy and play video games, but eventually the bill arrives...

So, I was coming back from another frustrating job interview, sitting at the bus stop, waiting for the bus to come, when a wind hits and a colored paper stops at my foot.

ACME Daycare! The city's new daycare center hires:

- Secretaries (Women)
- Financial director (Women)
- Receptionists (Women)
- Caregivers (Women)
- Cleaner (Women)
- Training Assistant for Caregivers (Men and women of short stature)

I never imagined myself working in a daycare center in my life, but I confess that the role of Training Assistant for Caregivers caught my attention. I had no idea what that was, but I'm really a short guy. I was almost a dwarf, and that really hindered me at school and in my love life, which I never had.
The bus arrived, I put the pamphlet in my pocket and went to my apartment...

Once there, I took things out of my pocket, threw them on the table, and along with my cell phone, came the daycare pamphlet. I started thinking, got courage, and called. After 3 rings, a lady with a docile voice answered:

Attendant: ACME Daycare, how can I help you?

Sid: Oh, hello... uh... I called about a... job opening...

Attendant: Oh yes, what a shame, our vacancies are almost all filled...

*Sid has already put his job hopes down, however...

Attendant: Except for the vacancy for Training Assistant for Caregivers. Are you interested?

Sid: Oh... yes, that was the one...

Attention: HOW CUTE! I mean... oh, how good! We are interested, can you come tomorrow at 7 am?

Sid: With you, and... what do I bring to the interview?

Attendant: You don't need to bring anything, if you're accepted, you'll start working tomorrow, okay?

Sid: Okay, I can do it.

Attendant: When you get here, look for Miss Parker. Good luck! *Turn off the phone

Wow, that was weird, and amazing! I felt like I was already hired. She was so happy when I told her about the vacancy... I took some college lessons, and I was lucky that the next day I didn't have classes. Maybe if I talked to them tomorrow, I could make my class and work schedule more flexible, and thus get money.

The next day I woke up anxious, had my breakfast and went to the address indicated in the pamphlet. As it was a little far away, I took a bus that left me on the corner, and from there you could see the place. A giant, colorful sign read "ACME Daycare, a fun place." I entered the building, and the reception was already full of children's drawings in a very happy tone. I was surprised, because I didn't hear any noise from children, nor a parent coming to bring their child to daycare. However, whatever, I went straight to speak to the receptionist.

Sid: Hello Madam, I am Sid. I have come for the Caregiver Training Assistant interview.

*A lady with black hair and glasses leans forward to see me, and lowers her glasses. She made this effort because I was almost the size of the counter and could barely see myself.

Receptionist: Oh yes, I should have noticed... Welcome, and come with me.

That lady entered a door behind her, and I followed her. I don't know if she was very tall, but I was certainly very short, as I didn't reach her chest height. She walked through the corridors, and at each door I read what that room represented. "Food Room", "Diaper Changing Room", "Nursery", "Secretary", "Director's Office" and at the end of the corridor there was a room with a sign saying "Training Room". However, I didn't enter this room, but rather a room without a sign that was before the training room. In this room there was only a central table with several chairs, and you could see several women's bags in the closets. And at the back of this room there was another door, which probably gave access to the training room.

Receptionist: Sit here, Miss Parker will come and talk to you soon- And she walked out the door.

I sat down, and as soon as everything was silent, I realized that there were some people in the next room, the one that the door at the back of the room gave access to, which was the Training Room.

After 5 minutes, the door that led to another room opened, and I was sure that it was a group of women on the other side. But only a tall, dark-skinned woman with short bob hair, wearing a blue apron, came out of the door. She closes the door and silence reigns again, then she turns, smiles and walks to the other side of the table.

Miss Parker: You must be Sid! I'm Miss Parker, it's a pleasure.

Sid: The pleasure is all mine.

Miss Parker: We're so excited you're coming, I wanted to say thank you very much.

Sid: Really?

Miss Parker: Yes, we have been trying to fill this position for months and have never been able to. You arrived on the exact day we will need it. If everything is ok, we would love for you to start today.

Sid: Well, that... that would be amazing.

Miss Parker: Well, here's the contract. There you can see functions, schedules and also your payment...

*The word payment became music in Sid's ears, and he didn't even care about the rest of the specifications. He went straight to the salary, which by the way was highlighted in yellow, and saw that it was a value that would help him with everything he needed. And without thinking twice he signed the job vacancy.

Miss Parker: Oh, wow! So... Welcome! haha ha

Sid: Thank you very much Miss Parker, for the opportunity. *Sid gets up to hand over the contract, and from the other side of the table she notices how small Sid is.

Miss Parker: Aww, look at you, you're perfect for this position

*She says in a very maternal voice

Miss Parker: We already know your size, now I just need to know one thing.

Miss Parker walks around the table, goes towards Sid who was standing, and with great ease, picks him up, supporting his butt in one of her arms, and holding his back with the other.

Sid: Hey, wait... what's this...

Miss Parker: You're perfect for this job-Says Miss Parker as she rocks Sid like a mother would with a baby.

Sid: I don't... understand... what I'm going to have to... do...

Miss Parker: Well, basically, you're going to be a baby.

Sid: A baby? Like this?

Miss Parker: Well, this daycare is new, and we need to provide training for our new Caregivers. Many daycare centers use dolls, but we value real things, that's why we hire you.

Sid: Well, if I may, why have you never held a real baby?

Miss Parker: Babies can't work, Sid. It's against the child labor law. We couldn't just use a real baby as a guinea pig. That's why you're here, to be our caregivers' training baby. You are small, light, and have come of age. You are perfect!

Sid: I don't know, I... I don't think so...

Miss Parker: But Sid, I saw you loved the salary. Do you want an easier job than this? You just need to imitate a baby, and nothing else...

Sid: Well, that's true...

Miss Parker: And also you already signed the contract. Termination carries a fine of 12 months of wages paid.

Sid: What? No... let's... let's start then...

*Miss Parker smiles and pinches Sid's cheek

Miss Parker: Good boy! Well, in that other room there are some ladies who are eager to see you, and start the training. Let's go...

Without saying anything, Miss Parker, who was still holding Sid on her lap, takes him to the other room.

Miss Parker: I won't lie, it can be a little intimidating. But I guarantee that once you get started, you will start having fun. Just remember to stay in character, and be confident.

*we enter a nursery where 6 other ladies are talking. All are silent and look at me, some with a big smile on their face, others with doubt. Although I'm 18 years old, I'm quite short and skinny, I would be easily mistaken for a child. All of them will be future caretakers at the nursery, and will get all the necessary instructions on how to take care of a baby from Miss Parker, and of course, using me as a baby. So, you announce me.

Miss Parker: Ladies, I would like to introduce you to Sid, your future baby at the daycare center. He will be helping us train you by taking up the role of a baby. Please say hello to Sid.

*all the ladies say together:

- Hi Sid!

*I just wave my hand in embarrassment, and start looking around the nursery. Lots of colors, drawings, toys. A closet with a pile of diapers and a crib. On a table covered by a mat with children's drawings is a pile of diapers, with a little paper plaque that says, "Sid's Special Diapers," and it makes my heart flutter. So, I call Miss Parker to speak in her ear.

Sid: Excuse me, Miss Parker, it's just... why is my name on that pile of diapers?

Miss Parker: That's for training purposes, Sid. When we are training the future caregivers, we want the situation to seem as realistic as possible. So, we prepare a special area just for you, with diapers and other baby care products. It is important to make things convenient and easy for the future caregivers to learn. Once you start taking on the role of a baby, you will be cared for like you're a real baby. Is that okay with you?

Sid: Well me, I was taken aback about the diapers. I'm really embarrassed.

Miss Parker: I understand. It can take some time to get used to. But as I said, it's important to make things seem as realistic as possible, so that the future caregivers feel more comfortable taking care of real babies, like you, at the daycare center. You will be the main baby at the daycare center, that is, you will be the only "client" of the daycare center. And it's important for the future caregivers to get used to dealing with a single baby, before they deal with a whole room full of babies. So, does this make sense to you?

Sid: Well, I... I really need this job, then. All good. You can start your class.

Miss Parker: Perfect. As I said earlier, it can take some getting used to being the center of attention. But you will get to experience first hand how hard it is to play with babies, feed them, change them, put them to sleep. These are all very tiring activities. And once the future caregivers see how hard it can be, they will be much more motivated to put that extra bit of effort when taking care of real babies, because they know how difficult it can be. I will just ask you this, Sid, are you a deep sleeper? *She looks at me

Sid: I think yes

Miss Parker: Perfect. So, once the future caregivers put you down for a nap, don't worry about it, you won't be disturbed. Now, let's begin. The first step will be a brief introduction of yourself. We call that the "warm up." This is a way to make the future caregivers feel at ease, and get them thinking about the baby. So, just be yourself, introduce yourself, tell them a little about yourself, and ask them about themselves. You need to do the "babble talk" to make it sound like a baby, can you do that?

Sid: Okay... yeah... *I think a little

Sid: Miss Parker, I think you'd better introduce me as a baby, and babble talk with me, so I can respond.

Miss Parker:  Of course, Sid, let me help you out and introduce you...

Let me introduce Sid. He is a little baby at the daycare center. He is very curious and likes to explore the world around him. He loves playing with toys, he is very friendly and loves to smile at people. He likes to make a lot of funny noises, and he loves being read to, and being sung to. We know he will be a great addition to our classroom.
Okay, now, Sid, how would you respond to that?

*I see that all the ladies are smiling at me, and I can only say:

gogo gaga

*I put my thumb in my mouth

Miss Parker: Great! That's perfect. Now, can you tell the ladies your age? You need to do the babble talk, make sure it sounds like a baby.

Sid: I'm... ah... 18 years old...

*some ladies put their hand over their mouth to keep from laughing. One of the caregivers approaches me and crouches down to my height, pulling my cheeks.

One of Careguivers: I think this little guy is quite small for his age, isn't that Miss Parker?

*Ms. Parker laughs discreetly

Miss Parker: Yes, there may be a little difference in size between he and the other babies, but don't worry, we still love he just the same. So Sid, it's time to take off those ugly adult clothes and put on something more appropriate for the occasion... the future caregivers here are very professional, they can handle watching you undress.

*Ms. Parker approaches Sid.

Miss Parker: Here, let me take care of that.

*Miss Parker starts by taking off my pants and shirt, showing the ladies how they will have to do this when taking care of real babies. I'm very shy to be undressed in front of the ladies, so I covers his eyes with hands, but Ms. Parker asks me to remove his hands.
I'm completely naked and embarrassed, standing in front of all the ladies. Just waiting for what will be the first lesson that Miss Parker will teach the new caregivers.

*Miss Parker smiles and turns to the class.

Miss Parker: Ladies, here is a demonstration of how to properly change the diaper of a baby. As you can see, the baby's clothes will need to be removed first. And then, the diaper will be changed. You see, when you work with children, it is important to be patient, and to make sure that the baby feels safe. So, while changing a baby, make sure to talk in a soft voice, and be sure to keep smiling and showing the baby that you love them. Have you understood so far?

Caregivers: Yes ma'am

*one of the caregivers being trained raises her hand and asks.

Caregiver Jannet: Miss Parket, are you going to put him on the changing table? Can we come around the changing table to get a better look?

Miss Parker: Yes, Jannet, come on around to the changing table. It's important that you get a close look at the process. And yes, I will put Sid on the changing table now.

She puts me on the changing table, and begins teaching the ladies how to change a diaper. I lie there and just see the image of all the caregivers gathering around the changing table, looking at me. At this point I just cover my private parts, and in a cute way I say:

Sid: I think I want to go home...

But the Ladies interpret it as if I'm imitating a baby

Miss Parker: Sid, we still have a lot to teach these ladies. Now, would you be a good boy and stay on the changing table while I show them how to change your diaper?

Sid: Yes... ma'am

Miss Parker: Good boy. And for our future caregivers, as you work with babies, it's important that the baby feels comfortable with you. So, it's important that you talk in a soft voice, use words of appreciation towards the baby, make sure the baby feels safe with you. Now, I will begin changing Sid's diaper. Do you see the fasteners that keep the diaper secure? This is a good lesson for you, because you need to be able to undress and get your baby dressed quickly, so the baby doesn't get cold, but also securely enough that the diaper won't leak.

Caregiver Tracy: I like the design of these diapers, are they Pampers? Didn't know Pampers had an "Adults" model

Ms. Parker chuckles slightly

Miss Parker: That's right, these are Pampers "Adults" diapers. They are designed like diapers for babies, but they are adult size. So yes, they have the same features and functions as classic baby diapers, but they are designed to fit adults and teenagers. Pamper is an innovative company, and they have been trying to create products that cater to this particular demographic. So, Sid, while we do have many different diaper brands we can use with you, these "Adults" diapers are indeed the ones we usually use.

Caregiver Jannet: They are really cute, they will make Sid even more childish. Well, from what little I know, now is the time to put the baby rash cream on, right?

Miss Parker: Yes, Jannet, you are correct. Once the diaper is changed, we will use baby rash cream to avoid the baby getting a diaper rash. This cream is completely safe for the baby's skin, has a creamy texture, and comes in lovely scents. Some smells like lavender, some are strawberry, some are vanilla, there are many different scents in the market. Now, I will put the cream on Sid and I will show you how to do it. It's very important that you rub the cream in gently for the baby not to feel irritation.

She shows the ladies how to put the rash cream on me.

Caregiver Tracy: I see you grabbed his ankles and lifted his leg up, is this the most effective technique for applying the rash cream?

Miss Parker: Yes, Tracy, you are correct again. When applying the rash cream, you need to make sure to make contact with the baby's skin. So, you can either lift the baby's legs, as I do, or you can reach under the baby to put the cream on. You don't want any gaps in the application, because if there are no cream in certain parts, those are the most prone to chafing and soreness.

Caregiver Jannet: Just the butt? Not at the front?

Miss Parker: Both. Yes, make sure to apply the cream to the butt, and to the front. You don't want any soreness, or redness, or chafing. You need to cover the whole diaper area with the cream. And after you apply the cream, please remember to thoroughly wash your hands. This is important for health purposes, and also to avoid making the baby feel uncomfortable. *Jannet nods.

Caregiver Tracy: Can I try putting the rash cream on Sid's front?

Miss Parker: Alright Tracy, no problem. Let me show you the right way to apply the cream on the front. It's important to spread the cream evenly, and cover the whole area. You see, if you don't cover the whole area evenly, then there will be parts where the baby is chafed - a rash is likely to develop in those areas. So it's important to pay attention. So, just hold Sid's hands so that he stay still and doesn't move around, or just put your pointer finger right here, like this, and spread the cream evenly.

Caregiver Tracy: Okay... so... come on little baby Sid, let Miss Tracy make sure you don't get a diaper rash. Cream time...

*tracy goes to apply the cream, but I'm still has my hands covering his privates.

Caregiver Tracy: It's okay baby, you can take your hands off now...

*I continues with my hands on my private parts, and says no with my head.

Caregiver Tracy: Miss Parker, it's just... he doesn't want to take his hands out of front of him...

Miss Parker laughs

Miss Parker: Well, Sid, you are still a little shy with your private parts. That's alright, I know a lot of people are shy to show them. But now, you will need to be okay with us seeing you naked, so these ladies can learn how to change your diapers properly. Here, let me help you get your hands out. *She removes his hands slowly.

Caregiver Jannet: Oh my God! What a little pee maker! hahahaha - says Jannet in a cute way, which makes the women laugh and pretend to be impressed with the size of my penis.

Ms. Parker laughs

Miss Parker: Well, he is almost 18 years old now, and he's not a baby anymore. But yes, all boys are like that, they have to go to the bathroom a lot! And when they see a cute girl like you, they usually want to impress.

*The class laughs.

Miss Parker: Sid, for these ladies to be able to change your diaper, you need to keep your hands out of your privates, because then the ladies won't know how to do it when there is real pee or poo to clean up. They have to wash your private parts too, you know. 

Caregiver Jannet: Oh no, what I meant was... well... his penis is quite small for his age. After all he is 18, where boys are usually at their peak. But what we have here is a very tiny penis, it's like a real baby.

The other caregivers agree and Ms. Parker laughs

Miss Parker: Yes ladies, well, to be honest it's not the size that's important. What's important is that it works.

Miss Parker's statement makes them laugh even more.

Miss Parker: Come on, don't laugh, what's important is that you learn how to change the baby's diapers, not the size of his penis.

Some of the caregivers laugh again, and others look a bit embarrassed.

Caregiver Tracy: Miss Parker, when you say about the penis working, you mean about wetting the diapers, right? Because, I believe that with that size he cannot satisfy a woman hahahaha.

All the ladies laugh

Miss Parker: Yes Tracy, you are correct, when I say it "works", I was referring to the wetting of the diapers. Now, ladies, I have to remind that it's important to behave like professional caregivers, and not make fun of the baby and his body. Remember, our goal is for you to learn about babies so you feel comfortable when taking care of them.

Miss Parker smiles at the ladies, who are starting to feel a bit guilty.

Caregiver Tracy: I'm sorry Ma'am, I thought a little fun would break the mood. I just thought its small size was cute. So can I go back to dabbing the rash cream on the front of Sid's diaper? Any recommendations for this?

Miss Parker: No problem, Tracy. Yes, you can go ahead and apply the cream to the front of the diaper. You know, when changing a baby, you will have to handle private body parts, and you will also have to be prepared for the smell and sight of baby poo. Now, for applying the cream, put some cream about the size of a quarter on your finger and spread it in a circular motion, starting from the inside. It really works best when you spread it evenly.

Caregiver Tracy: Yes ma'am

Tracy holds the top of sid's penis with one hand, and with the other spreads the rash cream with her finger in his groin, in the testicle and around the penis, but before finishing she lets go of the penis and screams.

Caregiver Tracy: OH MY GOD!!!

All the other caregivers wonder what happened.

Miss Parker: What's the matter Tracy? What happened?

Caregiver Tracy: I think he had an... erection... 


Continues...