Things here are not so good atm. Starting with my wifes car broken down which really hurts us as it is our main transportation for things like my doctors and such. A couple weeks ago we had a snowstorm here and yeah I fell and fell hard. I ended up in the emergency room. A cat scan later and they "said" it was some really badly bruised ribs. Gave me some pain meds and sent me on my way. 

  During this time my lovely wife brough a really bad cough/cold into the house. My immune system is garbage due to my health issues and medications so I am guaranteed to catch anything and I did. So here I am already in pain from my ribs and now coughing really hard.... I also had not noticed a very important medication was missing. The pharmacy dropped the ball on my auto refill and did not send my water pills. Mind you I am on a lot of meds so missing one is easy.

 Fast forward to last week and I am in agony from my coughing and my ribs... I am also starting to have a really hard time breathing. I had to go in to have some blood work done. The walk from the parking lot to the office I thought I was going to die. My wife and daughter went with me but stayed in the truck. Once inside they brought me to the room for blood draws and I was done..... This is in one wing of the hospital. They said I need to get tot he ER and one of the nurses grabbed a wheel chair and rushed me to the other side of the building.

   They called my wife and told her where I was and she showed up right after they took me in. I ended up stripped and sent to the cat scan rom again and they also took xrays. Tip of the iceburg. All my coughing broke a rib that they didn't see cracked. So that was problem #1. Not enough to make it so I can't breath at all so they looked me all over and asked if I was supposed to take water pills. I said I noticed I was out the other day and am waiting on them. Well I was in congestive heart failure hence not being able to breath. They had some new kid in there and her tried to put a IV in my arm and failed. I have a huge bruise from my elbow to my wrist. Needless to say they did  not let me go home and I spent three days in the hospital. They did a MRI, EKG and echocardiogram before they would let me go home. They also asked about my weight loss. In the time from the first ER visit to this one I lost 20 pounds... That is only 10 days to lose that much and they are now making me check my weight every day.

   As of right now my wife has me under house arrest. I am not allowed to leave the house or do much of anything till I am healed. Needless to say Christmas is canceled for us. Dead car. Almost dead me and no money to do a damn thing. I also attached a photo I took of the sunrise over St. Louis from my 4th floor cardiac room. Sorry for the long post. I really am not a social media person but I really need to be. I do hope you all have a merry christmas and a happy new year.
SeveredRealms
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Hey all,
  I know I have not posted in a while. I have been dealing with a lot of issues with my health and personal life that has sent my depression spiraling. They say when it rains it pours but freaking christ I feel like I'm in a damn hurricane these last few months. Physically, mentally and financially.. Everything seems to go wrong.
 I now have a thing stuck to my arm that connects to a monitor that's always screaming at me that my blood sugar is either too high or wakes me up in the middle of the night because its too damn low. I already have to take stuff to try and help me sleep only to have that thing start screaming at me. I have my wife's car sitting in the yard needing major work done. Yea I have had some help getting all the parts but I can no longer do the work myself so I have to raise money to pay someone I guess. Right now she is driving my truck and the gas it uses is killing us. Doesn't help she ends up taking time off from her job so I can make it to my monthly infusions and other appointments with doctors. Sorry I should not be ranting but this shit just sucks and every time I think things are going to get better they just get worse than before.....
   Anyway tis the holiday season. I do have a Halloween render but it was really late getting done. It's posted on my discord. I hoped to have it done but my left hand has been in a lot of pain making using it very hard. I started this one 3 weeks ago and I think its done. Enjoy and I hope those in the states have a good time with their families. Mine just got a lot smaller... Yea one of the personal bullshit things going on sorry.

  Hey everyone. I hope your all doing good. My health is still in the shitter and my doctors don't believe in pain medication. Just take Tylenol they say... Yeah that doesn't do shit. I am up to 4 extra strength Tylenol morning noon and night and it hardly helps at all some days. I was just at the hematologist today and once again my hemoglobin is dropping so I will need another blood transfusion as well as a Iron infusion.

  As for the game(s). I may have found some help with at least Nobody Knows. A young lady that would like to learn Daz and I have been letting her log into my shop tower and she has been doing fairly well learning how to make scenes and characters. Problem is she got started then ended up taking a RL job so I am not sure what amount of time she will be able to help with at the moment. As for me I have been trying to get the next scene started for Severed. I had to start from scratch on the environment and the extra NPC's. It has taken me pretty much a week just to get those done and I finally loaded the scene and placed the first person in it. I MAKE NO PROMISES as to when I get anything done for a release but I will try to get something done. My hands are fucked and I can only do so much before my hands are done and sometimes it takes a couple days before they feel good enough to do much.  Below are just a few quick renders to see how things look in Iray.

  I am still in desperate need of help. Even if your new and just want to learn. I am no pro at this stuff but I know enough to get myself and anyone else in trouble :P I also have people I can fall back on with questions. I do have one problem that will slow me down. I have to watch the temps on my shop tower. The one that does the hardest work. My 3090ti has a dead fan and I just do not have the money right now to replace it. With summer coming the shop itself will get pretty hot so I do not want to burn up the tower.
 
  Anyway I am still alive, I am NOT giving up on my games. Thank you to everyone that has stuck with me both supporting and just following along.
SeveredRealms

I redid the Render. Things like Kahlans outfit not seeming to fit right along with the way their legs seemed to be slightly in the floor. So I changed her outfit and made adjustment to the way her and Lily where sitting.4K version attached in a zip file.

Many hours later I got a scene for Christmas. Not my best work but enjoy. Merry Christmas everyone and may all your Christmas wishes come true.

Hey everyone. Merry Christmas from my family to each of yours. I really wanted to try and get a special render out to you all. I have been trying all day except for the times I was dragged away for one thing or another. Between daz crashing or models throwing errors and having messed up morphs and after all this fighting, chasing errors and such.... My hands just cant do anymore.... I'm sorry it makes me feel worthless.
 This time of year is always the hardest for me as well mentally due to some personal issues from things long ago that have turned Christmas into a holiday I dread. The image is a screenshot of 2 hours work ruined because daz crashed.... I know I know... Save Save Save... Tell my brain that when its turned to fucking mush from my damn meds....
I tried and like everything else these days I fucking failed....