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On Trackless Seas
Chapter 05
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I lay in my bath, lost in though. Today, I watched the world change before my very eyes. A god had descended from the heavens and graced us with his presence.
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I lay in my bath, lost in though. Today, I watched the world change before my very eyes. A god had descended from the heavens and graced us with his presence.
And in spite of his protests to the contrary, he was a god. Perhaps a ‘mortal god’ as Dravis proposed, as though that were common sense, but a god nonetheless.
It was plainly evident, regardless of what the books said. It was in the way he carried himself, his knowledge, his actions, his desire to help our people even when he had not known of us before. I said he seemed new to this and I do not think I am wrong, but he has all of the qualifications of a fine god worthy of devotion.
Then there was the way he made me feel. Made everyone feel. Reactions differed from person to person by degrees, but were similar along gender lines based on questions I had asked Dravis and Inumi, along with the palace staff. Though one reaction was universal.
Regardless of who was asked, everyone answered the same way. When they looked upon the captain, upon Kyle, they felt as though they were looking at the face of God. His words reached their hearts as though spoken directly to their souls and a feeling welled up—a desire to obey, serve, and please their God. It was almost fanatical.
In men, that became a desire to help, to go out of their way to see to his needs. Serving staff, feeling the lack of chairs, beds, and so on befitting Kyle’s stature was an insult, immediately demanded that they be made to accommodate him. Food he liked was noted down, more brought out, and plans for similar were made for future meals while foods he disliked were removed from the table and future menus for meals he would be attending. Offers were made to launder his clothes, shine his shoes, even wash the flying contraption he called a ‘bike.’
Lords and Ladies above I dread getting back on that thing again. I am not sure my dignity can take a second round. At least Kyle was polite enough to pretend he didn’t notice that I… That I, a grown woman, shamed myself when I lost control of my bladder.
No, Eruzonia. Don’t think about it. It didn’t happen. It won’t happen again. Turn your mind back to the subject at hand.
In women, there was another effect, in addition to the desire to serve. Most of the female staff couched it in indirect terms or spoke around it. He made them restless, unsettled, anxious, or ill at ease. At least Dravis and Inumi were forthright enough to answer plainly. Bluntly, in Inumi’s case.
So said Dravis: “He excites and arouses me. My body craves his touch, even just his gaze. Should I find the opportunity, I will certainly bed my Lord husband.”
That was understandable. Explainable, even. Dravis has, to my knowledge, been faithful to her vows since the day she took them and has never once lain with man or woman. Her frustration and desire is understandable, doubly so given the nature of her particular breed of Eru.
But so said Inumi: “He makes me wet.”
That is just strange. Inumi, perhaps infamously, has had eyes for only one person since she matured. While I’m flattered, my position forbids me from returning my friend’s feelings even if I wanted to—I must save myself for whomever I wind up marrying. Inumi has never shown interest in any man or other woman. And yet, Kyle “makes her wet.” That response is even more telling than Dravis’.
Of course, there is my own reaction to his presence to consider. To his everything, really.
His touch. Even now, I can feel his huge, warm hands dwarfing my own. His arms around me as we rode that flying death machine through the sky on the short flight back to the palace, making me feel small in a way I haven’t felt since my father held me as a little girl.
His scent. Clean and masculine without being overpowering. It still lingers in my nose and on my tongue even now.
Aroused is an understatement. I am so far past aroused it feels as though my insides are aflame and only his touch will put it out at the same time it is likely to only excite me more. I feel a vast, deep emptiness past my slick nether lips that my fingers, now seeming so thin and short, will never reach.
If he asked to take me to bed right this second, my answer would be damn the empire and to present myself to him upon the nearest flat surface. I do not know if it is even possible for our species to produce offspring, much in the same way a wolf cannot mate with a house cat, but the though of the very possibility makes my insides quiver and leaves me more needy by the moment.
I will need to pack more smallclothes, otherwise I think they will never be dry again.
I have to go with him to the neighboring kingdom tomorrow. I do not know how long my self control can last. For the sake of my dignity, please let it be just a few months. Until this is all over and settled.
I have the makings of a plan in mind. My younger brother has the same education and training as myself, a contingency in the event I were to die, that the royal line not be broken. He could easily assume the throne, should something happen—or should I decide to step down.
With no more Erulona to govern, my people would be better served by a new ruler, especially if I can prove myself loyal and useful and secure my place at my Lord’s side in the days and years to come as something more than a bedwarmer of royal blood. A representative to speak for all our people to our God, and to carry his words back to them.
A representative cannot work on her own and I would be lost some days without Inumi, so I would need to secure a position for my advisor, confidante, and accomplice in all things.
Of course, religion is the purview of the church. Dravis will want her own place at his side. She would be deeply in my debt if I could convince Kyle to allow it. I could hold it over her head for years…
That is all putting the cart before the horse, however. First, we must prepare our people for Dravis’ Great Pilgrimage. And they would certainly be more likely to welcome that idea than the knowledge that, through an unforeseen turn of events, the very sun above us is going out and there is nothing we can do to stop our home from freezing over completely in eternal winter. The final winter of Eruvia.
I’ll need to prepare a speech. Several speeches. And likely sign a mountain of decrees Inumi has already drafted.
Later.
While the water is still warm, I will try to scratch this itch and see if I can eke out enough satisfaction to survive another day.
