No Toilet Challenge - Week 10: Rashes & How I Learnt to Stop Worrying and Love the Diapers

Hello,

We have reached ten weeks of diapers and I feel like I'm reaching some sort of zen state with them. It used to be that wearing a diaper was a very occasional thing for me. I never really gave it much thought, believe it or not with the job I do. I just would put one on, use it a little bit, break out the vibrator and go change. 

Now, I feel like I've been neglecting a lover for years and am only now beginning to appreciate them for who they are. Maybe I'm going insane from all the diapers, and the noxious fumes from my diaper pail, but I feel like I'm falling in love with them again. I mean, we are called Diaper Lovers, after all!

I've worn enough nappies this year that the thrill of it has lessened. Like, when you've been on dates with a new partner. Everything feels new and exciting for a while, but eventually you settle into a routine. That isn't to say you love your partner any less, more that you grow used to them. The thrill of the new and exciting is replaced by a general joy at being around them.

Basically, I think that's happening to me and my nappies.

I've worn loads this year. 124, to be precise, more than I've worn over the last decade or more, I suspect. Yes, the first ones were exciting, and working out how to navigate the world without the toilet was interesting and challenging. But now those first few dates are over, and now I'm appreciating the nappies for what they are.

I've grown to truly appreciate their comfort, and the way they feel against my skin. The crinkle, the thickness, the padding... When it's dry I love how loud it is, when it is soaked I love how big it gets. Walking around my flat with the diaper hanging gently from my hips... It's gone from new and exciting, to the shine wearing off, to a general comfort that I love.

I've found myself, in recent weeks, when sat at my computer, just idly touching my nappy. Not in a sexual way, I'm not rubbing it super hard or anything like that, I'm just idly running fingers across the smooth surface, gently prodding the spongy padding underneath. I'm sitting in my chair, feet up on my desk, and just enjoying the view of the diaper between my legs.

I've been appreciating the weight of them, the textures, the sights, all of it. The complete package.

Maybe you are wondering what I'm going on about, you're wondering why I'm saying all this like it's new information, but for me, I'd grown distant with nappies and this recent venture has taught me to really appreciate them again.

Years ago, not long after I started going out with my girlfriend, she got upset because I wasn't giving her enough attention. She would send me things on Discord and I just would react, I would miss messages and take too long to get back to her. I was being a bad partner, I was taking her for granted and it was wrong of me.

I'm not perfect now by any means, but I realised the error of my ways and started working doubly hard to make sure I spend time with her everyday, to talk to her, do things together. It's absolutely something I should've been doing all along, and I needed someone to bonk me on the head to make me realise I was being a bad partner.

I liken that experience to diapers... Sorry girlfriend, but yes, I'm likening you to a nappy right now.

I had grown complacent with diapers. I always had a bunch and never really used them, they sat in the closet and under the bed, always there but I rarely looked at them. This challenge has been the bonk on my head. I'm spending time with them, and the more I do so, the more I appreciate everything about them.

It's important, in all aspects of your life, to take a step back sometimes and just look at what you've got, to really appreciate the people, hobbies and things you love. Think about why they bring you joy and truly just enjoy them.

Most people would be embarrassed at writing such a love letter to a diaper, and, sure, it is a little silly, but I think it's something that we could all apply to all of our lives.

Anyway, aside from me discovering that (shock and horror) I like nappies, the other thing I've experienced in the last few weeks is my first ever diaper rash.

Yep, never before have I had a rash, my skin is like steel... but the defences were finally breached.

I noticed an itchiness whilst sitting in my messy nappy, I changed out of it and showered, but could still feel a spot that felt irritated. After some difficult positioning to get a picture, I saw a little patch of skin that looked very irritated. I must've missed that spot when spreading the nappy cream that morning.

I now understand how annoying they are. I didn't let it hinder the challenge, but it did mean I had to be a lot more careful how I handled my nappies. I spent several hour periods each day with nothing on my lower half to let it heal... and since I am so used to nappies at this point, I did sit on a puppy pad, just in case!

It healed up quickly, and no harm was done. It felt like it was a message from the Diaper God, striking me down for my hubris. I'd been spending increasingly long periods in messy nappies without really thinking about it. This was a message that, yes, I have tough skin and don't get rashes easily, but I'm still a mere mortal. I need to look after myself whilst still enjoying the squishy nappies I love so much.

That's all I have to say. Here are the stats for the last couple of weeks. A time where I have passed 100 nappies worn, and 50 messy ones. Who knows how many I'll have by the time I stop!

Week 10:

Number of nappies: 16

Messy nappies: 8

Toilet uses: 0

Times “overexcited” in nappy: 3

Number of leaks: 0

Week 9:

Number of nappies: 12

Messy nappies: 6

Toilet uses: 0

Times “overexcited” in nappy: 4

Number of leaks: 0

Overall:

Number of nappies: 124

Messy nappies: 61

Toilet uses: 1

Times “overexcited” in nappy: 23

Number of leaks: 3