Did you enjoy yesterday? I hope so. For those of you who were lucky enough to cum I hope you were thinking of those poor girls who were either ruining theirs or not even cumming at all. I bet they were thinking of you…
On SubscribeStar this is the week’s listing (it got long enough with just five days so I'll post the weekend's task at the end of the week) so you can see what’s ahead, know how to prepare for the next day and mix things around to fit in with your schedule including your period.
Each day you can join with all the others using the online form to be accountable to yourself and me by clicking this link. It's all anonymous and I hope it helps: Daily Feedback Form
Today it’s all back to an even footing.
No touching for everyone!
That’s right, hands off the goods! There’s still a choice for you today. Is it just ‘no touch’ or is it ‘Strict no touch’.
Let’s get some definitions:
No Touch is when you aren’t allowed to directly masturbate, but you are still allowed to play freely above the waist (hello nipples my old friend) and also rubbing againstobjects, but only a little bit, no proper humping, you’re not allowed to get close from it, let alone cumming. It is, yes, just to make things worse.
Strict No Touch is when you’re not allowed any stimulation at all. If you want to still play with your nipples you decide that. I generally think it’s good but you may prefer the idea that you’re allowed no stimulation at all. You can even go as far as not being able to wipe after you pee. Feel free!
Don’t know which you want to be on today? Flip a coin. Heads it’s no touch, tails it’s strict no touch.
Reflections on Edging
Congratulations on lasting through yesterday’s no touch - it’s tougher than you think once you throw it into the midst of more active denial, isn’t it!
So, today we’re going to try something a little bit more introspective.
One of the benefits of denial, that I always bang on about, is how it can make you feel much more comfortable and positive about your body. That mix of arousal and self induced pleasure, along with the whole ‘self love’ element of masturbation anyway, can be such a positive force.
Today we’re going to amplify that.
Your edges today are to be done in front of a mirror (wherever possible).
That’s right, you’re to look at yourself, as you edge.
You can try this a few ways. If you’ve never got up close and personal with your pussy, then I encourage you to play and finger and fuck with a make up mirror held so you can really see and appreciate how amazing it is down there.
If you have a full length mirror then start by stripping slowly in front of it, have some fun (feel free to laugh) putting on some music and getting your thang on as you strip down (doesn’t have to be completely naked, but if you can that’s great), and then lie back, legs spread and watch yourself edge.
If you have a suction cup dildo then sticking it to a mirror and fucking it is super hot. Make sure it’s secure though.
If it can come off the wall then putting it on the floor, sticking the dildo to it and riding it like that will give you some remarkable views!
Or just ride it on the floor looking at yourself:
And then probably my favourite, do it in the bathroom mirror, leaning right in, looking into your own eyes. Intense, amazing, beautiful.
Now I also have an even more cringeworthy task to add to this. On one of those mirrors, take a post it note or stick a piece of paper, on which you’ve written 'You are beautiful’. And just leave it there, to read, to say to yourself, for as long as you want.
Feel free to add others!
Let us know how you get on!
Toys, toys, toys!
We talk a lot about sex toys on this blog, and that’s for one simple reason, they are BRILLIANT!
So today’s task will be different for different categories of you.
For those of you who don’t own any sex toys I want you to look up the diy sexy toys tag on the blog and find some inspiration to try something you can use to move yourself beyond just fingers.
The two easiest options are a hairbrush handle as a dildo, and an electric toothbrush as a clitoral vibe. Read up on the blog and find for each edge you do today, try something different!
Don’t forget a brush with a flat back is also great for some pussy and bottom smacking fun! Try getting just to the edge then giving your pussy a nice smack - it’s a great way to pull back from cumming.
For those of you with toys there will be those of you with a minimal set, and those with lots!
Your challenge is to use your toys in unusual ways. If you’ve just got a vibe or a vibe and dildo you could try things like:
putting the vibe in your panties and grinding on it
gently smacking your pussy with the dildo instead of fucking it
sliding one of them in you and walking around with it in
placing the dildo on a chair and just sliding over it
trying the vibe on your nipples and around the outside of your (clean) ass
If you have lots of toys, dust off some of the old ones and see what new combinations you can experience!
Finally, for everyone, with no toys or plenty, use today to start considering buying a new toy. Whether that’s in a local store, or online, have some fun edging while looking at toys and maybe even buying some.
And if you like my recommendation of our favourite sex toy store, Lovehoney, then you can buy via our affiliate link and it’ll even give us a small amount, so you’re actually supporting the blog (but just type their address into the browser if you object to that).
Explore sex toys at Lovehoney should take you to your country’s store. Their deals of the day are usually great and make sure to check out the sales and offers sections.
Dressing up, for you!
Did I mention that one of the reasons I love edging and denial is how it helps you feel more positive about your body and your sexuality. Okay, once or twice.
So, another thing that can have a similar impact is dressing up. Whether that’s for a date, or an interview or just being with friends, the things we wear can have a huge impact on how we feel.
Now it might be that you already love dressing up, or that you already want to kill me for even suggesting this, but as with all these tasks, let me encourage you to take it at whatever level works for you, but do try and push yourself, you might be surprised.
So this is going to work a few ways, you can do all, or just one of them. The first, and this is one of my favourites, is that you wear your sexiest underwear, under your normal clothes today. This is the heart of this activity, that it’s about how it makes YOU feel, and not how other people see you. Sexy can mean whatever works for you. Just picking your favourite set is great. For me the whole stocking set, especially with a garter belt (we call them suspender belts in the UK) is hard to beat. Why? Because they’re so completely unnecessary. Just all the extra effort they involve, there’s something beautiful about that.
Beyond that, if you wear the panties OVER the belt straps, then it becomes immensely practical, for, you know, taking them off without having to mess with anything else. Handy for edging huh…
For you though, it might be as simple as wearing a thong when you normally wear straight cut panties, or if you want something unusual, try wearing a thong backwards. It’s more than interesting.
If you don’t have any fancy underwear to try, then a fun alternative is getting an old pair of tights (pantyhose) and cutting a slit out over your pussy. Just a slit, not a hole, and they’ll open up and leave your pussy exposed. Some absolutely love this. You can try it with leggings too if you have a pair you don’t care about getting cut, and messy.
So that’s about dressing up, under your clothes.
Now to the outer layer. I want you to have fun dressing up, but not for anyone else. Just for you. You are to dress up, for one of your edges! Really go for it, make up, hair, and most of all something you feel really sexy in. It could be an outfit, it could be clubwear, or favourite nightwear. Dress up, for you (and perhaps a lucky partner if they’re around).
Go sexy, go slutty, go sophisticated, whatever you’re in the mood for.
Then just go for it, a long, sensual edge, reuse some of the things you’ve enjoyed these last few days. Take your time, put on some music or a movie or porn. And then, if you’re pleased with how you’ve got on these last few days, you’re allowed a ruined orgasm to finish the evening off. But it’s entirely optional.
For those of you with more time on your hands today and wanting something a bit riskier, then here’s an extra idea to try.
You’re going to play dress up, but you’re going to do it in your favourite clothes stores! Head in after a good hard edge. Pick out some outfits that you probably would never buy but think might look hot on you. And then spend time in the changing room, trying them on, and edging. Yep, right there. Every time you take an outfit off you’re to slide your fingers between your legs and have a little edge.
This would be a good one to take a sexy friend or denial buddy to. It’s more fun and very amusing to be daring each other to try outfits on.
Don’t forget shoes, try on some crazy heels (don’t trip) just for the hell of it. And if you didn’t have any outfits or lingerie you thought were sexy for the earlier tasks, maybe try buying something. I’m regularly told of all the thngs I get a sub to do, having her buy only good lingerie and wear it every day is one of the most impactful.
Speaking of which, if you’ve never been properly measured for a bra, see if you can get it done as part of this. Having the right fit makes a world of difference, I’m told.
Have fun, and with this one, if you fancy sending in pictures of how you dressed up, at home or in a store, I’m sure everyone would love to see them. But no pressure, it’s only if that turns you on. The core focus of this is you dressing, just for you!
Spread the Word! Tell someone about Denial
Now this is VERY optional, but if you can feel it’s an option I encourage you to try. If not, then your task is a to simply edge while you're on the phone to someone. Or chatting. Just doing it secretly while they have no idea you're doing it.
I genuinely feel like denial, long or short term, is a brilliant, positive kink. It can totally open you up to new experiences, teach you much more about your own sexuality and body and when enjoyed with someone else can be as hot as pretty much anything within the BDSM world.
At a personal level it can help you with developing discipline and self-control, and also be quite powerful in helping alleviate things like anxiety or worries.
Oh yes, and it makes you feel AMAZING!
So, it really is something that is worth sharing, well you know how great it is, I don’t have to tell you. But how do we tell others, that’s the question?
It really depends on your friendship groups. Some of you will have openly kinky friends and it’ll be as simple as saying ‘Hey, I’m doing this Denial Challenge, have you heard about it? I thought it might be fun if a few of us tried it.’
But most of us don’t have friends we can tap up so easily, so that’s when we need a more subtle tactic.
So if you have close friends who you share a lot with and sex is part of that, but just don’t have the openness about your kinkiness for the previous approach, then something like this could work. We link it into the recent trend for ‘challenges’
Have you heard about this Denial Challenge thing? I was browsing on Tumblr and saw it, and it sounded interesting. It’s a sexy self control thing, where you have to try not to cum for a month! Apparently it gives you this natural ‘High’ - sounds kind of cool.
So at this point they are either going to show some interest, or make it pretty clear this is not for them. In which case you stop. But if they DO show some interest then we have a wonderful magic trick…
Google loves my blog. You don’t have to tell someone about it in detail, you can ‘act’ vague, you can simply say ‘Google ‘Female Orgasm Denial’’ and the blog pops up right near the top
‘Oh yeah, that must be the one, click on that and have a look. They’ve called it ‘The Advent Denial Challenge’ or something like that. Oh there it is. Let them have a read and if they show some interesting… ‘I think I might give it a go! Want to make it a competition?
Even if they don’t, you’ve used a very nonthreatening way to introduce them to the idea of denial, that you’re going to try it, and give you the chance to discuss it with them another time. If they are the slightest bit curious they’re going to start reading more of the blog… and you know what that does to you, don’t you. And if they don’t, but they’re positive about it, maybe ask if they’ll keep you accountable as a way to encourage you to be self-controlled. What are friends for after all!
And if they do fancy trying it, keep it low key, communicate vaguely about the fact you are doing it, and how it’s making you feel. Ask them if they are too, and how they are finding it. Just take your lead from them, and maybe pick out some ideas and even captions to share with them in the future.
So remember, no pressure to do this at all, but if you love edging and denial, and they are a good friend, then they may well be interested. Because believe me, this stuff is REALLY fascinating.
So go and spread the gospel of denial my lovelys! Fly, FLLLLYYYY!
I hope that's worked having five days in a go. Do remember to keep telling me how're you doing and feel free to message me here, on Tumblr or email me at [email protected]