Journal #25: Thank You for the Past Decade, and on to 2020

Greetings my friends. An early update today to wish you all a Happy New Year. The last year and also the decade has been filled with ups and downs. From the payment gateways being shut down, spate of piracy, physical injuries and almost quitting to finding out that I have a good number of core supporters who are filled with patience and understanding, I like to thank you from the bottom of my heart. To be an independent creator especially in this field is tough in today's world and sales aren't at the point where they once were, but with your support, I hope to still forge ahead in this path that is dark and wholly unknown especially in this current social climate. There are a lot more stories to tell.

Doing what I do, it is time consuming and work-heavy but with this passion project  comes with it my pursuit for excellence to my detriment sometimes to deliver work of quality. But in the end, I've seen my follower count go beyond 10,000 at Pixiv and 2,000 on DeviantArt in the past year, numbers which blow my mind, members are still able to find me no matter how many times the powers that be try to censor this work. And now I find a temporary home on Patreon, Subscribestar & Hiccears. I am ever grateful and as long as I still feel that people are interested in my stories and works, I will keep on going. I have supporters leaving me feedback, from even the small stuff like alerting me to typo errors that I've written, submitting stories, or lending support and help whenever I have issues strike me, I am ever thankful.

If I am ever slow at updates I apologize. Creatively, this has been a solo operation and I think it's that aspiration for perfection that slows me down. I find myself rushing to update a post, then finding out a new voice for a story, or an avenue to improve on an already done artwork, which pushes that said update a day or two or even a week. But at least, any update I put out, I know that it is something I am proud of publishing. I aim to be as good or even more superior to some works you see out there in the mainstream, be it comics, movies, television or novels. That is my goal.

In part, working with this content is a delicate thing. In one way, I like to see it grow, and another, I do not want to promote it or be where it doesn't belong. I understand that this fantasy is a rather dark sort. But being a student of history, these thoughts exist even from the dawn of mankind and to push these thoughts down it is to live in a world of repression and homogeneity. And God knows what repression does to ones mind when it lashes out in harmful ways such as in religiously oppressive states and countries. Only that for those who harbor these fantasies, here is a little corner where you won't feel so alone. You are not a monster if you think it but not act on it. There are others like you. It is what you do (or don't do) with these thoughts which makes you a stronger person. And this is where I come in with these stories. So we can live out these fantasies through the exploits of the Van Duynes, Wynn "Big Game" Hunter, Kokhorov the Founder, "Anibal the Canibal" Zepeda, and many more.

Terrible is the world where one dictates how others should act, think or feel. If one disagrees with these stories, don't open that book.

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I usually post an update with some sort of artwork and I am tempted to leave this as a mere written journal. However, I shall not disappoint, as peppered around this blog post of sorts are odds and ends of artworks that I'm currently working on or loose pieces without context. You might see them again as part of some larger story, comic or otherwise. At least this makes the post feel less sparse.

If you folks wouldn't mind that I sometimes post these "journals" or blog like entries and not so much written content, as a form to connect better with all of you, let me know. Doing art puts me in an introverted state of mind where I need to disconnect with social media and correspondences to come up with my imaginative stories.

With that, Forbidden Feast wishes you a Happy New Year.

For the website version of this message along with bonus artwork for members, click on the link here.